Meditate
No new updates.
I kept up with the routine.
I’m back to listening to guided meditations. Why?
My mind kept wandering around when I tried to do meditate on my own.
Multiple thoughts would come in and out. Ideas pop up – ideas I wanted to put more thinking into but since I’m meditating, I have to postpone the process until the session is done.
It’s been almost 30 days of consistent meditation (the approximate number of days to build a habit).
By now, I thought I’d be able to share its benefits by describing the experience of meditating.
But I can’t, at least not in a way that I would convince others to do it.
Quick Morning Exercise
Failed consistently this week.
There are mornings when I feel like doing more of one thing while stealing time from the other.
That decision offsets my schedule. And when that happens, things don’t happen the way I intended to.
I tried to make up for it by exercising after work but I always feel exhausted to do anything (even when I sit on the desk all day).
The need to relax got to me, every day this past week. While that sounds normal (and a good thing), I abused it. It drove me to play video games.
I allowed 30-mins of play but it quickly turned into 2 or 3 hours.
That happened for three days straight.
I binged like a fatty who was deprived of chips for weeks. I felt terrible after…
Lazy Week
While missing my quick morning workouts and playing video games are considered to be “bad”, I did not regret it.
I try to stay away from the idea of “Perfectionism”. The above example shows it’s normal to fall off a routine.
I’m sure you’ve heard, “change IS constant”. My failure to follow my morning routine is a sign that I need to get better at adapting to changes. No day will ever be exactly the same as the other.
Or perhaps, I’m going through a burnout?
This week’s update also feels like it’s been written half-assed. For some reason, I just don’t feel like writing. The passion to practice writing is missing. Perhaps I didn’t get enough sleep?
I slept late – later than the usual but still managed to get up really early.
Anything I write from this point on will be irrelevant to you, but not for me. This update is something I could go back into to find out when the “burnout” (to do anything) starts to creep in. But before I start feeling guilty for being lazy, it’s important to acknowledge my “mini-wins” this week:
Learned to swim more effectively
Beef Broth (roughly following the Brodo cookbook)
Meditate
Finished drawing: “Shaolin”
Lazy Week: The Aftermath
The feeling of guilt (for being unproductive) eventually faded away. It was then replaced by the desire to be productive.
Dwelling in a feeling of guilt triggered the question, “Ok…so what are you going to do about it?”
That internal response/question was all I needed to get my shit together.