Wrong Assumptions

It’s very common.

I came home last Friday, irritated by that person who sent me an “urgent” e-mail at the end of the day. I was able to push the issue off over the weekend and made it my mission to talk to him in person on Monday.

Monday came, I talked to him about how he should’ve just talked to me in-person instead of sending me an e-mail and copying everyone in it. I did it calmly, not in an irritated voice. Then I realized he was just like me – he has little or no knowledge about the issue at hand. Both of us were dragged into something we were unaware of.

The lesson? You really can’t jump to conclusions until you discussed the issue at hand in-person.

We’re all aware of the bad effects of assuming. But we do it all the time. I still do even though I’m aware of how dangerous it is.

We tell ourselves a story – a made up story that only exists in our head.

A story that doesn’t reflect the truth, but the reflection of the assumptions and the mood we are in at a given moment.

Doing things that way is harmful to ALL of your relationships.

This is why I don’t want to participate in gossips anymore (yes I used to be one of those people too). They are stories created from people’s opinions that are also based on other people’s opinions.

If you have a secret to tell that doesn’t benefit me? Keep it.

If you’re looking for someone to bitch with about someone you don’t like? Not interested.

If you’re complaining about something instead of looking for ways to solve it? I don’t want to be a part of it.

This is why I tune people out when I hear them bitching about things that don’t really affect the quality of their life.

I prefer to listen to people who take action. People who are working hard at addressing the issues in their life.

Those are the kinds of people I wanna surround myself with. More focus on the solution instead of putting blame on others.

I’ve seen this happen at a larger scale this week at work. The display of…

 

Teamwork

I’m involved in a challenging project that had a very tight deadline.

Everyone works individually, scrambling to get their part done to accomplish the project.

Each member focuses more on finishing their task instead of focusing on the overall accomplishment of the project.

This dynamic changed when an emergency meeting was raised to get everyone to be in alignment with each other.

After that meeting, it was all hands on deck!

The mindset changed from: “I’ll do this because it’s my job” to “I need to do this so I can help the other person finish their job”.

The focus was changed from “don’t blame me me me” to “helping them them them”. Very subtle change but it made a huge difference.

Seeing things that way is a key to improving the existing relationship we already have.

Instead of focusing on benefiting yourself, focus on the benefiting others. And you do it willingly without wanting anything in return. Expectations often lead to disappointment, so don’t expect anything.

This is why I decided not to bitch at that person who irritated me for sending that urgent e-mail.

Or my neighbor who parked over my parking spot (by mistake).

Disagreement only makes things worse. Proving you’re right will only make things worse.

Instead of bitching, lean on understanding the other person and come to an agreement. It’s better for (not only for one person but) for everyone.

Everyone involved in that project came to an agreement after that meeting – a beautiful display of teamwork.

Ya ya ya I appreciate these little things. Perhaps it’s due to my interest in…

 

Personal Development

Yea I’m a big fan.

I’m a big fan of understanding human behavior. I read books on persuasion, communication, and mindsets.

When I tell people about it, their initial reaction is to test what I know (so far). Asking questions like “Really?” or “You sure you know?”. And then they come up with examples to disprove pretty much anything I know. And when they make a point or if I couldn’t address their question, I get discredited. I’m a joke. Then they tune me out lol *SMH*

But I get it. Most people don’t want to be told what they should and shouldn’t do from reading books. I also read books about communicating better with other people – body language, voice tonality, or simple scripts or mindsets to help me become better at communicating. Things/skills that should come naturally. I also bought…

• magazines to help me upgrade my poor sense of fashion (I’m still bad at it but it’s not as bad as before).
• books on improving my personal finance.
• how to make extra income,
• about business.
• online courses (related to everything I already mentioned).

I also signed up on websites for free e-books. Watched videos on Youtube. Hell, I’ve done all of that. And I’m still doing it.

Which is why I’m thinking about writing more content about it. I wanna use it to help me on my journey of creating…

Side Income

I have a website. I wanna build an audience. How? I don’t know. But I narrowed the direction I wanted to take in three ways:

• Promote my existing artwork to other platforms.
• Research more about personal development.
• Share what I learned about personal development through blogging.

I need to create a list of tasks in my calendar to push me to take action.

I was also itching to buy another book or program. But after a while, I realized that I still have a crapload of material I acquired (from 3 years ago). I’ll go through those first before jumping on to another rabbit hole that would only distract me from my long-term goal: make money on the side.

What about you? What are you working towards other than work and family?